Goals...

So this year I have many goals...
My biggest goal is my weight loss and I have been trying my best to lose the excess pounds but it is so hard. I have been eating healthy, counting calories, drinking green tea, downing lots of water and doing cardio and numerous workouts. Even with all of that, I feel like I am getting no where fast. I keep thinking to myself...maybe my body is a pack rat and does not want to let go to the pounds b/c it's emotionally attached to them.

I know that sounds dumb but I really don't know what else could be the reason for losing minimal pounds and yet I am trying so hard. I cannot give up but there are times where I want to just postpone the wedding just so I can shed more weight. I know that is not realistic but I just want to look good and feel good as I walk down the aisle. My Fiance keeps assuring me that he loves me and I look fine. Well I know that I don't feel fine and I know I need to lose weight to look and feel fine. It is so hard. He is on the diet too but I don't feel as though he is really trying hard because he doesn't work out or weigh himself often. He also has no problem indulging either. Bad Food will pop up around us like a vandal in a riot and I say "NO!" to the bad food and he says, "Come on! You can indulge here and there." This frustrates me sometimes because I wish he were more strict and when he advocates the bad food I feel like I am being a sour puss.

Guys just don't understand. We as women have to be and are expected to be glamorous, beautiful and seamless on our wedding day. We have to have perfect skin, hair dress and we cannot look like we are bulging out of it. I feel like I will look like a gross blob of white lace and its driving me insane and making me nervous about my BIG day. Everyone is so happy about the wedding and I thrilled to marry the man I love but I feel like I will look at my pictures down the road and say "OMG, ILL, put those away-I look hideous and fat!" I don't want to feel like that so I am doing all the things that I believe will help me but still losing ever so slowly. It sucks so bad. I hate it. I wish for one day I could be made of clay and I can sculpt myself the way I want to look. I know, I know--I live in a fantasy world and I dream too much but I am a Pisces and that's what we do=Dream!

Well enough of this pointless banter about things I cannot change (as fast as I'd like).

Lord, please grant me the metabolism of Olympic sprinter and the patience of Gandhi.

BUFF Bride...Super Woman!

When I woke up this morning I immediately thought about my weight loss goal. I know that I am not going to do the Retro Fitness thing but I don't want that to delay my goal. I have to take the matters in to my own hands because let's face it-who else can I count on to get to my goal? I have my wonderful supportive Fiance but I need to really just face the reality of doing it myself. So with that in my mind, I began thinking of ways to complete my workout at home. I remembered that back when My hunny popped the question he bought us both books to help us get in to shape. The books have been sitting and I think it's time to really take them seriously and have them teach me a thing or two!

The book my fiance got me is titled BUFF Brides by Sue Fleming:

I read through it and I have to get some essentials before I kick off my workout regimen. I have to get an exercise ball, dumbbells, workout mat, ankle weights and a stepper. I thankfully already have a treadmill so that makes my shopping list a little less expensive! I am going out and getting these items and I promise myself to remain positive! It's going to be hard but I want to be successful in my journey. I want this to not only be about my wedding but about my health in the long run.

My family has a history of health issues which include, diabetes, cancer, obesity, high blood pressure and I want to try my best sway away from the health issues in anyway I can. I plan on having a family full of children (if Lord blesses me with one!) and I want to be a strong mother and wife. One that will have the energy to be healthy and happy for my loved ones. I know I can't be super woman but I will try my best to give it my all and I believe being healthy will help tremendously! I also want to set a good example for my family and let them see that I am serious about living life to the fullest.

I want to be their SUPER WOMAN!

Wow...this cartoon is hot!

Fitness...Retro style

My Fiance is the very best! I was moaning and groaning to him about my lack of weight loss even though I have been eating much healthier, counting calories and doing cardio several times a week and he looked in to a personal trainer at Retro Fitness. He wants me to work out the correct way and not just starve myself as he says I do. I totally do no but since I eat proper portions, he thinks I have been starving myself.

We took a tour today of the Retro Fitness gym and we were both impressed with it's modern approach to fitness. There are flat screen TVs attached to every machine, which was pretty neat and there was a movie theater room with cardio machines. The theatre is huge and features a different 80's movie each day. I am so excited to go there. I meet with a trainer and he was very helpful and we are going to meet on Monday to go over my goals. I am nervous because I know I am so out of shape but I am also excited because I want to feel good about certain areas again. Plus I want to look beautiful in my wedding dress. My fiance assures me that I am beautiful no matter what which is why I love him so much but I want to feel beautiful!

Wish me luck!