Saturday, February 14, 2009

My decision...

Okay so in my last blog I stated I made one of the hardest decisions and I wasn't lying!

I decided to resign from my job. This was a very hard decision because of the current economy but I have strong faith in God that I will land another position that will allow me to be happier.

I had been miserable at my job for about a year now and I got to the point where I knew I had to leave but felt trapped because of bills, a mortgage, car payments, student loans...etc. I bought a home with my Fiance in March 2008 and since then I tried my hardest to make the best of my current work situation so I wouldn't leave him with all of the bills. I am a perseverant person but I am also human and could only take so much at my job.

My job caused me to become so stressed and I did not like the person I was during my work week. I would come home, cry, skip dinner, and just feel like crap. My fiance noticed my sad demeanor and helped me the best way he could and that meant he gave me supportive, unconditional love. God I love that man! He kept me going and for that I truly appreciate him. He supports my decision and he believes I will find something. I will probably take a pay cut but if that means that I am back to being happy Clarissa, then it's worth it.

After being fed up yet again after talking to my boss I took my break. I called my fiance crying my eyes out (yet again) and after all the tears flowed I knew it would be the last time this job made me cry again! I shouldn't be this stressed and my fiance agreed with my decision. I drove to a church near by and prayed. I know that God won't let me drown and I have faith that I will overcome this hurdle!

I went back to work and confidently handed in my resignation letter.

I made decent money at my current job, but if I deducted every tear, stressful moment, anxiety attack, frustrated moment and every bit of BS I endured then I would say that I made below minimum wage. I understand the more you get paid the more stress and responsibility you will take on, however I value my personal life and loved ones dearly and my job wanted to work 'round the clock. Working endlessly did not allow me to do the things I love and that made me miserable. The managers would frown down on anyone calling out for illness, family emergencies and any other life-related situation. They mandated 12 hour work days with no extra pay (yes that is illegal) and they sincerely didn't care if they worked you to the bone.

After 2 years of dealing with all of the nonsense, I put my 2 weeks in on Friday February 6, 2009 and my Last day is February 20, 2009. Leaving is going to be bitter sweet because I will miss all of my friends at work. I did make some great relationships with my co-workers and I will definitely keep in touch with them because they were great!

Everyone at work has been so supportive too. I expected everyone to say: "Are you crazy? Leaving a job now?" Instead a few told me they too were leaving soon because of the unfair work conditions and other told me they were proud of me for being strong enough to move on. Many were happy for me because they know how bad our working situation is and if one of us breaks out..then it gives hope to someone else who is thinking of leaving. Crazy how what I just wrote sounded like I was leaving Jail!

Since my resignation I have put my resume out like crazy and I have an interview on Monday already! Wish me luck!

I have faith things will fall in to place! I love my life and peace of mind is worth so much to me.

I know I made the right decision!

These are some quotes that have helped me thus far with my decision:

“Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become."

"When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home." ~Betty Bender.

"I’ve learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life". ~Maya Angelo.

"Decision is a risk rooted in the courage of being free.”

"It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”

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